Saturday, 27 August 2011

#166 …when you’re glad on your life getting entwined with someone else’s.


My first feet into the household after that social bonding carried no thoughts just mechanical action. For the past week I had participated in hundreds of rituals supposed to make my married life happy and prosperous. Not that I believed in all those. To me, it was just a way of thanking God for entwining my life with Karthik’s. I smiled as I put my right foot forward to lightly kick the rice pot placed at the threshold and then with the same smile I walked on leaving my footprints on my new home’s floor.  

#165 …when someone leaves behind a vacuum.


Though I had asked him to stay away from me, to not to talk to me, yet I didn’t know how I would ask his thoughts to stop flashing in front of my eyes. I didn’t know how to erase his memories from my mind; how to barr them from popping up every now and then like that spring jack in the box. I had no idea how I will go on without the assurance of his back up. Every next second I found my resolution wavering. I wanted to run into his arms, to talk to him incessantly, to listen to him halfheartedly. I was ready to give up the rest of my life for having my old life back, be it for a little time that no one can steal for me. I know I would move on… but a vacuum would remain permanently in my heart.

Friday, 26 August 2011

#164 …when he calls when he says he's going to call and shows up when he says he will.


Little did Mr Bell think that his invention or rather the manners of the users of his invention would one day be used to define love.
I was exasperated with friends not returning calls. And it was the same with family members. I started hating signals and networks. So when Madhur stood out of the league with his prompt replies, it was like sun shining through grey clouds. Months later, when I had fallen for his warm, garrulous and mysterious ways, did he admit that he always had a soft spot for me. I immediately had it. Laid bare. The reason behind his promptness to stay connected in this unconnected world.  Today, those very wireless cords and signals, mobile phone towers and telecom servers, convert his bytes of data into messages which are warmer and creamier than the cocoa from Starbucks.

#163 …when he loves another girl, you smile and say – I’m happy for you, but all you really do is cry.


Madhubala was very serious about marrying Dilip kumar, but he did not pay much of attention on her and chose someone else for marriage.When he married Saira Banu, Madhubala was sad but said, “He’s got married to a pretty girl. She’s so devoted. I am very happy for him.”
Madhubala would cry a lot those days. She loved tempestuously and lost tragically.

Thursday, 25 August 2011

#162 …when he gives you lots of attention and time.


It was his sister’s engagement. Though I didn’t want to go for I hardly knew anybody there, I couldn’t decline his invitation too. Thank god, Prachi had agreed to come. Grudgingly, I arrived at his place only to find Prachi wouldn’t be coming. If I could, I would have ran back home. As I glanced at the sea of faces, Dinesh came and tapped on my shoulder.
“Congratulations!” I said turning around.    
“Thank you. I am glad you came. Come I’ll take you to my sister.”
On my way back home, I realized the evening hadn’t been as awkward as I had thought it would be. Thanks to Dinesh who didn’t leave me alone for more than a minute, I had enjoyed every bit of it.
Next day I called him up to ask him to come with me for shopping.
“I understand it’s a holiday and you might be busy, so don’t hesitate if you have prior plans. I just thought a guy’s views will be better since I had to buy for my bro,” I said.
“Hmm.” After a while he added, “I am totally free. Will be at your service shortly.”
When Prachi called me in the evening to chat, she revealed Dinesh was supposed to go her place to finish economics’ syllabus that day, but had cancelled it at the last moment. When I told her of my shopping spree with him, she was astonished.   
“It was he who needed help in some topics and therefore had planned the joint study session. And then he cancels it for some stupid shopping. I don’t understand,” she said.
But I understood. Nobody would be ready to devote so much time and attention, unless his heart was ruling his head.

#161 …when you worry about losing him.


Sitting with him cosily in the pleasant atmosphere, 
under the awning of the locally famous roadside tea stall, 
1000 miles away from his hometown, 
why was I still worried that he might return 
to the land of his fond memories 
and never come back 
when he was repeatedly assuring me of his intention 
to stay back and start a new life here??
Somehow, this feeling is ever present in my heart.