#242 …when she treasures the gifts that he gave him.

I was on my cleaning drive just before the Diwali, when I relived an entire episode from my past life. It began with the wardrobe when I stumbled upon an Aqua green tee that was too small a size to fit me now. When my maid asked me to give it away, I protested. How could I? It was the only apparel that he ever bought me. I am to keep it with me till eternity. I got up, went to my CD collection and took out a particular disc. One look at it and anybody would know it wouldn’t read anymore with the no. of scratches that it had. But I placed it back, safely. Next was my bookshelf. After 10 mins of searching in that unorganized heap, I got what I was looking for. “Five point someone” I opened it and caressed the first page. It still had the words “Happy reading” handwritten with the date and signature, though the ink had faded a little. I finally went to my side table and picked up the teddy. Couldn’t stop my tears from rolling down my cheek – not now, not then. When he gifted me that as a parting gift 8 years ago!! 

#241 …when he gives you the feeling that the best is still ahead.

After being brought up in an orphanage, there were hardly moments in my past that I would cherish. Life did smile a little when I was capable enough to support myself and had moved to a rented place, but that was it – A little. Ever since Abhimanyu joined our office, I could feel sparks flying everywhere. But I am allergic to happiness. It simply doesn’t suit me – being happy. Not to face another disappointment, I held myself back. Thanks to him, he pulled me out of it quickly. He made me realize that the true meaning of Life is in seeing ahead, not looking behind. Today I stand straight, my head held high. I tell people that my best is yet to come and that I am sure it is on its way. Thanks to Abhimanyu, I have lots to look forward to.    

#240 …when you and she, together, can make magic.

We hardly spent 6 months together before deciding to tie the knot. Sometimes its enough, sometimes even a lifetime isn’t. As soon as we got married, the whole idea of living together changed. We had not thought of so many things. Thanks be to god, neither of us panicked. It was surprising to see that when we both worked at any issue, be it a mundane matter or some emergency, the problem was solved. And quite easily. As if some magic wand had been rotated in the air. With time, the logic behind the magic was understood – our understanding of and love for, each other. 

#239 …when they’re dying and the last thing they want is to hear your voice one last time.

We were still kids then.. 20 years ago.. Unaware of how relations mattered, how feelings develop, how things would change in the times to come and a whole lot of other things. What we were at all interested in was playing, hanging out, watching TV and doing things which people mostly called naughty. I vividly remember the time my grandpa was in hospital after his brain hemorrhage. Every morning and evening someone would go to meet him. It was soon understood that he wouldn’t survive for long. The message didn’t percolate to our generation. Even if it did, I doubt it would have mattered much. Death was still an unknown demon to us. That particular evening mom was asking me to accompany her to the hospital. I was too busy playing with my neighbourhood friends to agree on accompanying her. She kept telling me that grandpa would be delighted to see me, and I kept telling her to leave me alone with my friends. 20 years have passed.. But the regrets haven’t. I so wish to be regranted that chance to visit him – the last it would be, for he didn’t survive another day. He died with the unfulfilled wish of hearing my voice and seeing my face the last time.   

#238 …when a girl wants you to fight for her.

I just remembered an event that happened long back. Rishita, my best friend was going around with this guy in college days. Just like any other young blood, this guy would pick up fighting with every guy that happened to pass lewd comment on her. Considering ours was a co-ed college, I believed it was too mundane to pay any attention to. But Rishita enjoyed the attention and against my advice would rather provoke him into doing it. Thank god he was of a good built or he might have spent more than half of his college life in hospitals. Today when Farooq didn’t stand up for me when the local goon literally assaulted me, I was definitely pissed. We were returning from a late night show at the theatre to celebrate our one year of being together. Though I didn’t ask him to fight for my rights, I wished he would. It would have proved that he wanted this relationship more than I do or atleast as much. Now I was having second thoughts over the whole idea of being with him forever.

#237 …when a girl keeps going back to a guy who treats her bad.

"Its not because she’s dumb that she keeps coming back to you," I said, asserting myself to stop his dracunian laugh at her.

"What else could you think of? No one is stupid enough to go to someone who makes fun of you, who demeans you." he said getting up to go, probably not even expecting a reply.

"Its because she’s not ready to give up hope." I said. After few seconds I added, "That may be someday you’ll change. And love her back."

He stopped short. After a few seconds he continued his walking with a false laugh. The arrow hit where it ought to have.

#236 …when he wants to hand you over to a loving person if he has to depart.

Three years of courtship and now, two years into marriage. I would have to admit, I was getting tired of it. The reasons for loving him before were transforming into the causes for my restlessness now. I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings. I yearn for the romantic moments. My husband is my complete opposite. His lack of sensitivity and the inability of bringing romance into our marriage had disheartened me. Last night I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce.

“Why?” he asked, shocked.

“I am tired, there are no reasons for everything in the world!” I answered.

He kept silent, seemed to be in deep thought. My feeling of disappointment only increased. Here was a man who can’t even express his predicament, what else can I hope from him?

And finally he asked me: “What can I do to change your mind?”

Somebody said it right, it’s hard to change a person’s personality and I guess I had started losing faith in him.
Looking deep into his eyes, I slowly answered : “Here is the question. If you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind. Let’s say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death. Will you do it for me?”

He said : “I will give you your answer tomorrow….” My hopes sank deeper.
I woke up this morning to find him gone. I then noticed a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting, underneath a milk glass on the dining table near the front door, that read….
“My dear I would not pick that flower for you. Please allow me to explain the reasons further.” This first line had already broken my heart. I continued reading. “When you use the laptop you always mess up the Software programs, and then you cry in front of the screen. I thus have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs. You always leave the house keys behind. I thus have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you. You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city; I thus have to save my eyes to show you the way. You always have the cramps whenever your “good friend” approaches every month, I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy. You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom. You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes. I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails and remove those annoying white hair. I also want to hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand… and tell you the colour of flowers, just like the color of the glow on your young face… Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do… I could not pick that flower yet, and die.. ”

My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting as I folded back the note. I am now very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone…