#244 …when you feel secure with his arms wrapped around you.

I was trembling with fear. The police just took away my aunt charging her for harassing her daughter in law. Everybody knew she did not. It is her daughter in law who is evil and making up the whole story to harass us. A question hounded my mind. What if she next blames me? I quietly went up to my room and sat in one corner of my bed. Still trembling. Just then Sudhanshu entered the room, headed straight to me and wrapped me in his arms. Once secured in his arms, my trembling stopped. I felt safe. I was now ready to face whatever was in store for me.

#243 …when he is the theme of your dream.

“He is the theme of your dream? What is that? What do you mean?” I asked surprised.

 “It means at present I am dreaming of him.”
“So what? I dream of Shahrukh.”

“Exactly. And how do you feel for Shahrukh?”

I did not need to answer. I knew what she meant now.

#242 …when she treasures the gifts that he gave him.

I was on my cleaning drive just before the Diwali, when I relived an entire episode from my past life. It began with the wardrobe when I stumbled upon an Aqua green tee that was too small a size to fit me now. When my maid asked me to give it away, I protested. How could I? It was the only apparel that he ever bought me. I am to keep it with me till eternity. I got up, went to my CD collection and took out a particular disc. One look at it and anybody would know it wouldn’t read anymore with the no. of scratches that it had. But I placed it back, safely. Next was my bookshelf. After 10 mins of searching in that unorganized heap, I got what I was looking for. “Five point someone” I opened it and caressed the first page. It still had the words “Happy reading” handwritten with the date and signature, though the ink had faded a little. I finally went to my side table and picked up the teddy. Couldn’t stop my tears from rolling down my cheek – not now, not then. When he gifted me that as a parting gift 8 years ago!! 

#241 …when he gives you the feeling that the best is still ahead.

After being brought up in an orphanage, there were hardly moments in my past that I would cherish. Life did smile a little when I was capable enough to support myself and had moved to a rented place, but that was it – A little. Ever since Abhimanyu joined our office, I could feel sparks flying everywhere. But I am allergic to happiness. It simply doesn’t suit me – being happy. Not to face another disappointment, I held myself back. Thanks to him, he pulled me out of it quickly. He made me realize that the true meaning of Life is in seeing ahead, not looking behind. Today I stand straight, my head held high. I tell people that my best is yet to come and that I am sure it is on its way. Thanks to Abhimanyu, I have lots to look forward to.    

#240 …when you and she, together, can make magic.

We hardly spent 6 months together before deciding to tie the knot. Sometimes its enough, sometimes even a lifetime isn’t. As soon as we got married, the whole idea of living together changed. We had not thought of so many things. Thanks be to god, neither of us panicked. It was surprising to see that when we both worked at any issue, be it a mundane matter or some emergency, the problem was solved. And quite easily. As if some magic wand had been rotated in the air. With time, the logic behind the magic was understood – our understanding of and love for, each other. 

#239 …when they’re dying and the last thing they want is to hear your voice one last time.

We were still kids then.. 20 years ago.. Unaware of how relations mattered, how feelings develop, how things would change in the times to come and a whole lot of other things. What we were at all interested in was playing, hanging out, watching TV and doing things which people mostly called naughty. I vividly remember the time my grandpa was in hospital after his brain hemorrhage. Every morning and evening someone would go to meet him. It was soon understood that he wouldn’t survive for long. The message didn’t percolate to our generation. Even if it did, I doubt it would have mattered much. Death was still an unknown demon to us. That particular evening mom was asking me to accompany her to the hospital. I was too busy playing with my neighbourhood friends to agree on accompanying her. She kept telling me that grandpa would be delighted to see me, and I kept telling her to leave me alone with my friends. 20 years have passed.. But the regrets haven’t. I so wish to be regranted that chance to visit him – the last it would be, for he didn’t survive another day. He died with the unfulfilled wish of hearing my voice and seeing my face the last time.   

#238 …when a girl wants you to fight for her.

I just remembered an event that happened long back. Rishita, my best friend was going around with this guy in college days. Just like any other young blood, this guy would pick up fighting with every guy that happened to pass lewd comment on her. Considering ours was a co-ed college, I believed it was too mundane to pay any attention to. But Rishita enjoyed the attention and against my advice would rather provoke him into doing it. Thank god he was of a good built or he might have spent more than half of his college life in hospitals. Today when Farooq didn’t stand up for me when the local goon literally assaulted me, I was definitely pissed. We were returning from a late night show at the theatre to celebrate our one year of being together. Though I didn’t ask him to fight for my rights, I wished he would. It would have proved that he wanted this relationship more than I do or atleast as much. Now I was having second thoughts over the whole idea of being with him forever.

#237 …when a girl keeps going back to a guy who treats her bad.

"Its not because she’s dumb that she keeps coming back to you," I said, asserting myself to stop his dracunian laugh at her.

"What else could you think of? No one is stupid enough to go to someone who makes fun of you, who demeans you." he said getting up to go, probably not even expecting a reply.

"Its because she’s not ready to give up hope." I said. After few seconds I added, "That may be someday you’ll change. And love her back."

He stopped short. After a few seconds he continued his walking with a false laugh. The arrow hit where it ought to have.

#236 …when he wants to hand you over to a loving person if he has to depart.

Three years of courtship and now, two years into marriage. I would have to admit, I was getting tired of it. The reasons for loving him before were transforming into the causes for my restlessness now. I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings. I yearn for the romantic moments. My husband is my complete opposite. His lack of sensitivity and the inability of bringing romance into our marriage had disheartened me. Last night I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce.

“Why?” he asked, shocked.

“I am tired, there are no reasons for everything in the world!” I answered.

He kept silent, seemed to be in deep thought. My feeling of disappointment only increased. Here was a man who can’t even express his predicament, what else can I hope from him?

And finally he asked me: “What can I do to change your mind?”

Somebody said it right, it’s hard to change a person’s personality and I guess I had started losing faith in him.
Looking deep into his eyes, I slowly answered : “Here is the question. If you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind. Let’s say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death. Will you do it for me?”

He said : “I will give you your answer tomorrow….” My hopes sank deeper.
I woke up this morning to find him gone. I then noticed a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting, underneath a milk glass on the dining table near the front door, that read….
“My dear I would not pick that flower for you. Please allow me to explain the reasons further.” This first line had already broken my heart. I continued reading. “When you use the laptop you always mess up the Software programs, and then you cry in front of the screen. I thus have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs. You always leave the house keys behind. I thus have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you. You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city; I thus have to save my eyes to show you the way. You always have the cramps whenever your “good friend” approaches every month, I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy. You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom. You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes. I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails and remove those annoying white hair. I also want to hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand… and tell you the colour of flowers, just like the color of the glow on your young face… Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do… I could not pick that flower yet, and die.. ”

My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting as I folded back the note. I am now very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone…

#235 …when her voice is like music to your ears.

It was so like him to start flirting at that very instant. We have been exchanging messages for some months now. But this was the first time that we were talking on phone. Only at my hello and the few words of greeting, he commented, “Your voice is like music to my ears.” Who’ll not think he was flirting? Only it wasn’t true. Years later when I could believe when he repeated those words, he mentioned that he had actually meant those words even then. He had been loving me ever since, only I took time to realize it..

#234 …when you see beyond physical beauty.

A young couple decided to get married. Some months before their wedding, the bride met an accident and her face got completely disfigured.
"I can't marry you,” she wrote to her fiance. “I will stay sharp and ugly forever. Find yourself another beautiful young woman as you deserve. I'm not worthy of you anymore!"
Few days later she received this answer from her fiancé -
"Whoever is truly shameful is me, I thrust in that following to eye disease, the doctor just told me that I will stay blind! If despite this, you want to accept me, I still want to marry you! "
They got married at that time, the fiance was totally blind. They lived 20 years in joy and understanding. She was his guide and became his eyes and light. One day, she became seriously ill and was dying. She regretted living him alone in the darkness. The day she died, he opened his eyes to the astonishment of all.
"I was not blind,” he said. “I pretended that I was blind, for distressed her in the thought that I will see her face disfigured.” 

#233 …when u believe in deciding on what is correct instead of finding out who is right.

I was tensed since morning. I was about to invite Atharva to meet my parents. Though he was the man of my heart, he was definitely not of the gentlemen league. We have planned this evening for years and argued as much. He was right I agree, but sometimes that’s not the only parameter that matters. As I let out my plan to him, I had my fingers crossed. For once I wanted him to do what was correct instead on harping on who was right. To my astonishment, he agreed. Though I didn’t need it, yet he proved it - His undying love for me.

#232 …when you let him put onion in his sandwich.

Oh! Here again..

Reading about the soaring prices of onion in the newspaper brought thoughts that had been pushed in some dark corners of my mind way back. Couldn’t help smiling and then smirking – as if I could smell his breath now.

Gaurav’s thoughts came tumbling in my mind. We would so often fight on his eating onion with all meals. I hated that foul smell that entered my nostrils when he neared me after devouring those innocent-looking onions. I would shout, abuse – all in good humor and even bar him from eating it next time. But the very next morning it was I who would put Onion slices in his sandwich. I once again smiled. Tears rolled down my cheeks. No not from the bitterness of the onion in newspaper, but from the memories that had just overtaken my mind. I closed my eyes and prayed to god – I promise not to create fuss even when he eats onion. Just send him back. Soon!

#231 …when you wanna cry on your best friend’s shoulder.

I am glad for being blessed with friends like Dhairya – my best friend. Ever since Smita came into my life I had been ignoring him and others. He never questioned, never complained. Heard when I wanted to vent out, kept out when I wanted privacy, loved me when I needed him. When Smita moved to Jaipur yesterday, I never thought I’ll think of her so much. Only when Dhairya confronted me and I broke down on his shoulders that I realized I had special feelings for her. Imagine a man crying! I don’t remember crying in ages but this was different. I am glad I had something I could cry for. 

#230 …when it wipes out all sense of time, destroying all memory of a beginning and all fear of an end.

The clock always ticked.. It mattered one time.. I was always in a hurry.. Multitasking, running, planning ahead, competing, and god know what.. But today its different.. I have lost all sense of time.. There’s no fear of the end anymore.. No memories of the past.. I wanna live in Present.. Just as it is.. Forever.. And ever..    

#229... when someone can make you smile.

Boy - Can I confess something ?
Girl - Sure !!
Boy - You've the prettiest smile ...I've ever seen..
Girl - Can I confess something as well ?
Boy - Yeah..
Girl - This smile only exists because of you..

#228 …when you lose appetite.

“I am not hungry.”

“What?” The words came out of her mouth as a shock.

“What’s so shocking about it?” I asked her.

“You haven’t put a morsel of food in your mouth since morning and now you say you aren’t hungry and that too when I have prepared your favourite pastas.”

“I told you bhabi I am really not hungry. I ate when I was out. Can I be left alone for some time now? And please let everybody know I am off to bed early, so not to disturb me. And thanks.”

I quickly bolted my door from inside and lay on the bed. I wasn’t even keen on changing from my outdoor clothes. I kept staring at the ceiling for… I don’t know how long. It was the vibration of my mobile that brought me back from my world of thoughts. I checked the caller’s identity and let it ring. A message followed – “I know you are awake. Please pick up.”

“Should I?” I asked myself. Where has he been the whole day?

It started ringing again. I received. No hello from my side. He didn’t utter those words either. After a moment of silence, he started narrating some funny incident. Invariably I had a smile on my face. Then there was no stopping. We kept chatting for hours. When he finally hung up and I went off to sleep, I think I could see faint signs of sun coming up.

Loud banging on my door broke my sleep. I checked the clock on the wall and got up with a startle.  

“I am so sorry. I really overslept.” I said with a smile.

“No problem. As long as the sleep can bring your smile back you can keep at it.” She said with a hug.

“I’ll get dressed up in a jiffy and be out soon. Please handle mom till then.”

“I will. Till then I’ll lay your breakfast on the table – if you are hungry that is.” She eyed me with a question.

“I am starving,” I said holding my stomach.

We both smiled and as she was leaving my room, I asked, “Bhabi by any chance do you have any pasta left from last night?”

She winked. “I know you too well for that. Ofcourse! Now hurry up.”  

#227 …when u want to go again on rollercoaster ride.

The site of pandals coming up everywhere is more than pleasant. It brings with it not only the thought of Durga arriving in our houses and neighbourhood but also the titsy bitsy attachments – the sumptuous food, the night outs, the roller coasters, new apparels, garbas and dandiyas, the dhak and dhunuchi,.. the list is endless. Every passing year increases the intensity and passion with which people want to celebrate the festivals – Durga puja being the primary one in the city of Joy – Kolkata. This year was no different. The pandals were grander, the idols bigger, the spirit higher, the rides thriller and the entire experience – out of the world. Since childhood I have had a special liking to the rollercoaster rides. I would wait for pujas - for the sheer pleasure of riding the larger than life rides that starts getting assembled in the neighbourhood park much before we can see the goddess arriving with her face covered to be unveiled on the auspicious day of Saptami. As I sat on the rollercoaster, the stomach started churning. Like always I promised this would be my last ride – only if God is kind enough to save me from it. Just then I felt a hand on my arms. I opened my eyes which I had shut tightly in anticipation. He was looking into my eyes with a queer calmness.. I was immediately assured. I didn’t realize when the ride took off and when we were down. For the first time in my life I wanted to ride it again consecutively – but only with him beside me.         

#226 …when she spend hours to get ready for she wants to look her best for HIM.

We were tired of waiting for her. For the last 2 hours she was locked in her room trying to dress for a casual evening. Every time we knocked on the door, she’d call out, “Just another minute”. Soham had invited us all for dinner at his place.

“Ah! Madam is finally here,” Rohit called out.

We were stunned to see her. She was looking …..   Fabulous. But why? What was the occasion? On asking her she shyed. We were all the more confused at her behavior. She then whispered in my ears, “I wanted to look my best for him.”

#225 …when she fasts whole day for your longevity, good health and success.

“I am dying of hunger.” I said holding my stomach.

“A little longer Di. The moon’s about to appear,” she said with a broad smile.

“I had no option for I am married and according to rituals I cannot avoid it under normal circumstances. But why are you keeping this Karwa Chauth fast? You aren’t even married and you are not obligated by any ritual. Let your relationship receive our parent’s approval, and then you can observe.” I tried to put some sense in her.

“Approval or no approval. We share a relationship that I truly believe in. I feel pleasure in observing the fast for his wellbeing rather than considering it a duty to be followed blindfoldedly.  Hey, See, Moon’s out. Hurry before it decides to hide behind the clouds.” She said and we hurried to the balcony. 

#224 …when bcos of him you laugh a little harder, cry a little less, and smile a little more.

The other day early in the morning while I was preparing myself to start my day I suddenly found my cell ringing. Though it’s a little surprising getting a call that early in the morning, it is not totally unexpected. I moved towards it and found an unknown no. flashing.On picking up the phone I said HELLO. The person in front said the same but was suddenly very quiet the very next moment, as if regretting what he just did. I again said HELLO.. when no one replied I hung up. The very next moment I knew who it was.. Even after yrs of complete isolation I was 100% sure it was him.. I found myself mumbling, “I would recognize his voice anywhere in the world.”After all it was he who made me laugh harder, cry softer and smile enduringly. I don’t know why but I was happy the whole day. I very well knew the thing had no consequence. Yet… I found peace in reminiscing my past.

#223 …when rather than blaming her, u offer a solution for her mistake.

A boy was born to a couple after eleven years of marriage. They were a loving couple and the boy was the apple of their eyes. When the boy was around two years old, one morning the husband saw a medicine bottle open. He was late for work so he asked the wife to cap the bottle and keep it in the cupboard. The mother, preoccupied in the kitchen, totally forgot ...the matter. The boy saw the bottle and playfully went to the bottle and, fascinated with its color, drank it all. It happened to be a poisonous medicine meant for adults in small dosages. When the child collapsed, the mother hurried him to the hospital, where he died. The mother was stunned. She was terrified how to face her husband. When the distraught father came to the hospital and saw the dead child, he looked at his wife and uttered just four words. What do you think were the four words? The husband just said "I Love You Darling". The husband's totally unexpected reaction is proactive behavior. The child is dead. He can never be brought back to life but there is no point in finding fault with the mother. Besides, if only he have taken time to keep the bottle away, this will not have happened. No point in attaching blame. She had also lost her only child. What she needed at that moment was consolation and sympathy from the husband. That is what he gave her.

#222 …when he does romantic things for you.

Sings for you, cooks for you, fights for you..

Wipes your tear, erases your fear, always ready to hear..

Smile at seeing you, lie to be with you, call up to pick you..

Pisses you, Misses you, kisses you…

Gives you - Bear hugs, coffee mugs, velvet rugs..

Writes you – cute notes, sweet letters, charming mails..

Sends you – lilies, jellies and smilies..

Takes you – candle-light dinners, corner-seat movies, long-long drives..